Maf the Dog

I'm blog-failing. And going to do something that is so incorrect, but hey that's me!

I'm currently reading Andrew O'Hagan's novel The Life and Opinions of Maf the Dog and of His Friend Marilyn Monroe that my bookish friend MoMo gave me because it reminded her of me and I am loving it. I've been reading it for longer than I'd care to admit due to life but whenever I can I'm reading a page or two and working my way through.

It's not secret that I'm a lover of Marilyn and intrigued by her life, her real life, and not that glamorized Hollywood version of biographies, articles, and the like. I wish I was able to have a conversation with her because she is fascinating.

It's also no secret that the love of my life is my darling Shrimpy, who-no isn't a dog, but who-yes has ventured through my muddled life with me for the last 4 years in quiet (and sometimes not so quiet) attention. He's known when I'm sick before I do and takes care of me the same way I take care of him.

So O'Hagan combining Marilyn, her "unreported" life and writing it from the view of her dog Maf is an automatic love! However, that's not to undermine the exquisite writing style, the use of gorgeous imagery and word play, and the insight not into Marilyn but into humanity. The book is a work of fiction so how much of it is true, anyone can guess, but suspending reality and indulging in creation the novel is a work of art that reaches into the human psyche and motivation.

Maf is a wonderful narrator and learning about his "culture" is fantastic. The novel has made me smile and cry on the same page. It's a magical read and I cannot wait to get to the end...well, in some ways.

"When it comes to the story of people's lives, isn't it strange that we seldom know them in their quiet, reading moments?"
           -Maf the Dog, The Life and Opinions of Maf the Dog, and of His Friend Marilyn Monroe

My Girl's Birthday!

Today is my lovely girl-Marilyn's-birthday!!! So here is some of her wonderful wisdom for this and the next generation to benefit from.

I don't mind being burdened with being glamorous and sexual. Beauty and femininity are ageless and can't be contrived, and glamour, although the manufacturers won't like this, cannot be manufactured. Not real glamour; it's based on femininity.

I've never fooled anyone. I've let people fool themselves. They didn't bother to find out who and what I was. Instead they would invent a character for me. I wouldn't argue with them. They were obviously loving somebody I wasn't.


She was a girl who knew how to be happy even when she was sad. And that’s important—you know.

 Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.

 I want to grow old without facelifts. I want to have the courage to be loyal to the face I have made.

True Love

My last couple of posts have been lame to say the least. This one won't be eye opening for lots of people I'm sure. I know a lot of people will never have their opinion changed about this topic but I don't know if many people view this the same way as I do, so here we go.

One of the people I would love to meet the most in life and I look to a lot for inspiration, for perspective, for calm, is Marilyn Monroe.

I'll start off that saying I don't believe she committed suicide, and if she did, I don't think it was intentional, more a Heath Ledger incident.

Why do I look to her when Audrey is RIGHT there too? I love Audrey for different reasons, but I've always been drawn to Marilyn.

I think it started because I'm not an Audrey body type. I have curves, even at my thinnest I have hips and I have breasts. It's just my body and looking to Marilyn helped me accept that.

But it turned into a lot more than just her ability to rock the curves.

She has a history. She had experiences. She rose above all the obstacles life threw at her for 36 years. Sure she changed her name, she reinvented herself, but that just meant she got to create who she wanted to be. She was more than an actress on screen, she acted in her own life, she became her art.

Maybe that's pathetic or sad for some people. But the woman had a strong sense of self and was brilliant beyond her years. I think she had a lot more to say to the world about it but she bit her tongue because that's what she was to do. She wasn't a "blonde bimbo" and yes, she probably could have gotten any man she wanted, she had a few, but I think the main reason she couldn't, or rather, the men couldn't keep her was because they were intimated by her. She wasn't only gorgeous on the outside, beauty doesn't scare men, knowledge and power scares men off, and she had both.


She taught me that "It's better to be unhappy alone than unhappy with someone - so far. " When I felt I had lost everything, the words she spoke so long ago meant something. And that's why she matters, not because she was a giant sex symbol, because she was vulnerable and showed the world she was vulnerable. She didn't hide behind strength, her strength was her ability to be open when being a woman and sharing thoughts and feeling still wasn't the norm. She was beautiful on the outside and the inside.


I don't deny she had troubles and I don't pretend she was perfection. But neither was Audrey. If I've learned anything in life so far it's that I don't want perfect and striving for perfect will only end badly. What's perfect is loving people for who they are-flaws and all. Marilyn helped teach  me that and it's a lesson I couldn't be more thankful for. Being able to love that way means you are open to the possibility of true love.

I will always be a Marilyn, it's just who I am. If you can't handle me at my worst, then you certainly don't deserve me at my best.

“I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.”